Stellar Blade review: A lovably imperfect mongrel in a perfect skin

Eve’s outlandish curves and impossibly snug outfits have propelled the internet into paroxysms of delight and/or despair. She’s a super-soldier on a mission to save the planet from an invasion of grotesque monsters and Korean developer Shift Up offers no convincing explanation as to why she needs to be so scantily dressed. If titillation was the main aim, then Shift Up – making its first console game after a string of mobile hits in Asia – should at least have had the guts to offer the option of a beefy bloke in a pair of Speedos as a playable lead.

Outside of cut-scenes, Eve’s curves don’t matter so much in the furious ballet that Stellar Blade conjures in this future wasteland overrun by ghouls. Shift Up eyes up totems such as Nier: Automata, Dark Souls and Bayonetta as it pulls inspiration for the hack and slash gameplay.

Dodge, parry and counter-strike form the core of its basic combat in the early phases but an extensive skill tree and equipment upgrade system soon introduce permutations that let you tweak Eve’s style of attack. Challenging one enemy at a time rarely poses a threat but Stellar Blade often surrounds you with several. Even better, the variety of foes goes well beyond what you’d often see, with dozens of bizarre and agile creatures determined to eviscerate you.

And even that’s before you get to the mini-bosses, which fill the screen and pounce on you with a crushing potency. You’ll need to adapt your strategies radically and stay mobile.

The linear nature of the opening levels later give way to more of an open world and Shift Up perhaps makes the mistake of padding the levels with less engaging side quests. A leaner game wouldn’t have suffered too much because Stellar Blade’s moment-to-moment swordplay in a beautifully ruined setting is so moreish, even if its fundamentals feel a little second-hand.

The less said about its unconvincing voice-acting the better and the plot holds few surprises. But even those foibles can be overlooked when Stellar Blade gets its hooks in and you glance at the clock only to realise it’s 3am. Damn you, you adorable mongrel.